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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24003121">Self-Centred Eulogies and Pierogies</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ajax_Helios/pseuds/Ajax_Helios'>Ajax_Helios</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Killing Eve (TV 2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canonical Character Death, F/F, Is Niko a major character, Killing Eve: series 3 spoilers, Mild Swearing, Niko is mentioned, Villanelle, Villanelle is mentioned, i realise fandom doesnt really care about him but it'll have an impact on eve so im wriing this, idk but I'm tagging it in case, in case anyone's not seen it yet</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 22:14:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>525</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24003121</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ajax_Helios/pseuds/Ajax_Helios</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a little ramble of Eve's thought process that she might go through writing a eulogy for Niko, the last person tying her to humanity and being a normal human being.<br/>Aka. Suzanne Heathcote managed to make me care about Niko for a few minutes so I wrote about it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eve Polastri/Niko Polastri, Eve Polastri/Villanelle | Oksana Astankova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Self-Centred Eulogies and Pierogies</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It really says a lot about her that the thing she misses most is his cooking. She was passably okay at some things, but he was good. He was good.</p><p>God damn she missed his goulash. Pancakes, and his pancakes. It kept her normal, sane, human. She remembered the years when all she craved was that normality and the occasional party to keep things fresh. Content, she had been content. And then suddenly, that wasn’t what she wanted. What she needed. Pierogis, there was a little Polish supermarket a few minutes away but their pierogis weren’t the same.</p><p>More. She’d suddenly discovered the desire for there to be more. More to life, more than that monotonous normality. She may have been content, but she was bored, incredibly so, and she’d thrown herself headfirst into this dangerous obsession which endangered the safety of both of them. Niko was right to see her actions as selfish. She never once stopped to consider the effect this could have on him, how it all might impact him. Well, too late to start now.<br/>
He had been her tether to normality, to being an ordinary fucking human. With that gone, with what happened to Kenny, what was left for her to cling to? What was the point of trying to maintain any semblance of normality, of ordinariness? Why bother? She wanted more, she wanted excitement, she wanted to feel special, important, influential. At the end of the day Niko was none of that, had none of that, made her feel none of that. At the end of the day you reap what you sow, and so here she was, harvesting the fruits of her desire.</p><p>Fuck, she couldn’t even write him a eulogy that didn’t devolve into being abut herself. About what she had wanted, about what he had done for her, about how she felt. She had been selfish with him, around him, she hadn’t thought of his needs, his wants, his safety. Only her, her desires, her wants, her needs. And as things got more hectic, more involved, as that deathly obsession took root, she started thinking more and more about her, Villanelle. Her world narrowed to a tunnel vision, no room for Niko, only her. Constant thoughts about what she was doing, thinking, feeling. Everything looped back to her. Even his death (wasn’t her, that was obvious, the style was all wrong, the handwriting was wrong. Villanelle would have stood proud, would have announced herself, would have smirked at her the entire way through. She’s had the chance to kill him before but didn’t. She could be unpredictable, but she was stubborn. The note, the note didn’t make sense either, ‘Still got it’ got what? Why on earth would Villanelle write that. A set up, and a shoddy one at that, she was sure. Someone trying to make it seem like Villanelle killed Niko? But why? Why would someone try to frame Villanelle for killing Niko? What purpose could that possibly serve?), again everything links back to her somehow, somehow, and she didn’t know how.<br/>
Fucking hell, she really could with some of those pancakes right now.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I now realise I have written twice about Eve missing good food more than Niko himself. Im beginning to sense a theme. Polish food is good though guys. Polish delis always have the most amazing little sweet pastries and I know nothing about what's in them and what they're made from or what they're called but they're really good.<br/>I don't particularly dislike Niko, if he was the husband of a friend I'd probably like him because he's bland and boring and would treat them nicely. But lbr that's not for Eve so I never gave that much of a shit if he died or not.</p><p>(If you know any good recipes for sweet Polish pastries please share them with me. My tumblr url is originalhottubsweets)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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